Mommy Guilt

I can't believe how much work I have in grad school. I knew it would be hard but this is getting out of control. I thought fulltime school and planning a wedding would be not too bad. I am a nut. Now that the two day a week internship has begun, the weekly ten hours of reading and 2, 3, or 6! assignments a week are a bit much. And I don't mean homework assignments, I mean reasearch assignments and papers and nonsense. I have been to the histroical society three times in the last two months. They now use turnitin.com for papers which makes me incredibly nervous. Not that I plagarize or anything but jeez my last paper came up that I took from two high school papers which I had never even seen. Good God!

Plus this wedding planning business is driving me nuts. I can't pin down a color scheme. At least we have a date, Sept 23rd, and a church and a reception venue. Thank God! It only took 6 months to get one.

Plus I have the Mommy guilt. I don't see Ava as much and she is very clingy. I try to study upstairs while Steven is watching her downstairs. As soon as he turns his back she runs up the stairs and busts into the room saying "Hi! Hi!". She misses me and I miss her.

I really want to get good grades(and have to get them to remain in the program) but I wonder what is more important. Mommy guilt is rough.